hold my head, love, i'm sick tonight
find the open hole and press your fingers there with all your might
until the last ounce of my spirit bleeds onto the pristene sheets...

To talk or not to talk?

So I forgot when I typed my last post that I had given the camp staff my blog address. Sorry about that.

Today's pondering: I can't decide whether I talk too much, enough, or too little in class. Generally I feel like I talk a lot, probably too much, so I try to keep my mouth shut and listen to other people, but a couple of comments from classmates recently have made me wonder. I also feel like most of the time the things I do end up saying should really just have stayed in my head. If any of you have any opinions on this, feel free to share, even though I don't think anyone reads this who has had a class with me in the last - oh, five years at least. (If there are any Seabury lurkers who have discovered my blog, speak up!)

And Rory, I love you too.

edited to say: dude! my blog looks normal again! (now if I could only remember/figure out how to change the post title color so it doesn't look like puke...)

What just happened?

I still haven't absorbed that the Red Sox have actually won the World Series. It sounds really fantastically great, but I haven't realized yet that it's true, I don't think. Exciting nonetheless. (must remember not to watch baseball tonight...)

In other great things happening in my life: my Genesis 22 paper is done. Not the best paper I've ever written (and not just because of the World Series), but it's done, and done is better than good. Especially when it means I can stop thinking about Genesis 22, something I'm not fond of doing. You know, child sacrifice and all.

Also, I've discovered recently that an iBook doesn't cost nearly as much as I thought it did. This is both marvelous and dangerous news, considering that I really, really want a Mac. I'm still working out the justification for buying a new computer, even knowing now that I could actually afford it now, when my other one is only three+ years old, and while it's not a Mac, and doesn't love me, it does let me write papers and play music on it. Being surrounded by Mac-users, I have more help than is probably good for me in trying to justify this. Having posted this here, I'm sure Rory will jump in to help soon as well.

As an update to my accelerated pondering from the last post, I'm thinking I'm likely to end up here in Chicago next summer. Not entirely sure about that... definitely haven't told my parents I'm not coming home. I don't think they'll mind. The camp staff will be harder to tell - plus giving up living under my parents' roof is a lot easier than giving up camp.

A pox upon ATLA

Apparently, all computers everywhere must hate me, and I just didn't get the memo. Not only does my own laptop not access the wifi (still have to call d-link about that), but ATLA has been changed since I last used it (at least I have the consolation of knowing Andrew has the same problem), such that I can't make it do the things it used to, and the computer I was using earlier to play with ATLA suddenly stopped acknowledging the 'n' key, so I had to email my adviser sounding like my computer had a cold (o, I ca't fid aythig olie about this topic, am I icompetet?).

I dislike this immensely and declare that they should all stop torturing me.

It is possible, I suppose, that it's only PCs that hate me, and that if I were to switch to a Mac, I would find myself beloved of computers. Unfortunately, I really don't think I can afford to buy one right now, so that theory will have to remain untested.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled blogging.

I don't really have much to say... but it occurred to me that having "edited" as my last standing blog entry might not be something I wanted to leave there for a long time.

The Red Sox get to play again tonight, and this is good. It would be better if it did not conflict with the premiere of West Wing, but Micah has promised to let me watch the tape of West Wing, so I will be watching the game.

On a side note, I'm pondering (very quickly... accelerated pondering is one of my great talents) doing CPE this summer after all. My conversation about CPE in the waiting room yesterday made me realize a few things that make my reasoning for putting it off look less sound. Hopefully Friday's "what you should know about CPE" meeting will help with this discernment.

Right then. Off to do a round of Seabury blogs and then read about Modalism. (I swear that's more exciting than it sounds.)

edited.

Bah.

Things I despise: computers, D-Link, coughing, being angry (especially at God), lightheadedness, having to fish for things, being told "salad" (read: lettuce with a few tomato chunks) is the vegetarian option for dinner, my blog's current unsolicited format, being stared at for two hours (especially by people I barely know), evil, stupidity, being misunderstood, this week.

That is all.