Saturday, November 04, 2006

So much for that

Well, it turned out that I was away from my computer all day yesterday, so obviously I won't make the post-a-day thing for the whole month. But if Lent has taught me nothing else, it's taught me that you get back to your commitment right away after you break it, rather than giving it up altogether, so here goes. This will be short, though, because I got hit with a cold this morning and my focus is not what it might be right now.

Today, I spent the day at a retreat in Barrington, along with a few friends. During the closing Eucharist, I have to confess I heard little of the sermon. My friends said it was good, but I wasn't listening. Instead, I was watching a dancing evergreen.

Yes, a dancing evergreen - someone had turned on the heat right at the beginning of the sermon, and it was blowing the branch of a very delicate, almost fernlike, evergreen that lives in the back corner of the chapel. Now, I've been feeling just ever so slightly ashamed of how little I've grieved this year about the anniversary of my friend Emily's death Nov. 3. But as I was watching the fronds (?) of the evergreen dance, I could almost hear her say to me, "Don't worry about it. You're doing other things right now. But you and I have a date for right after you get here."

I'm utterly incapable right now of expressing in words how I felt just then, so I'll just say it was really great to "hear" from her in that way, and to be reminded that it's ok to heal.

And now I'm off to bed, even though it's only 9 pm, in hopes of being ready tomorrow for a full day of church, cleaning, and homework.

1 comment:

Raisin said...

Ah. No wonder you were reading C.S. Lewis at the break.